Dateline: BUCHAREST

Don’t panic! English is still lingua franca on this site. The choice for the title was merely meant to impress upon the unsuspecting viewer the artistic proportions of what is about to follow:

Zombie6 observes, discovers, dissects and interprets a number of liberal portraits [as in the National Liberal Party - PNL], seen during an electoral rally in Bucharest. Politics with an artistic twist, or art with a hint of politics? Discover for yourselves. [RO only]

Starting today, Dateline: Bucharest has a new look, a new feel, a new flavor. Standard NATO. You can now leave comments without being logged into Wordpress, and subscribe to feeds for posts and comments. All pretty standard stuff that was lacking before, and now it’s there.

And now for the credits. The man behind this makeover is Mihnea, who did all the work [no idea how he did it] and offered me hosting. Multzam! Also, a big Thank You goes to Ionut and Liviu, who helped me narrow down the choice of templates, and, of course, to Diana, who made the final call.

Please, do let me know what else you want to see here in terms of features, widgets, etc. Any ideas are welcome. Especially since now you can post them freely. Enjoy!

Think shallow. Think light. Think sun. Think summer.

We are interrupting our normal coverage of foreign events for a piece of breaking news. According to highly reliable sources,  Bucharest’s Second District is the site of some serious guerrilla warfare. The two camps are, on the one side, the local government, led by General Neculai Ontanu [incumbent mayor running for re-election], and a group of unidentified rebels fighting for his overturn [which may actually be linked to Al Qaeda, although Osama Ben Laden has yet to release a tape confirming this].

Here are the events so far:

1. the rebels stage a surprise attack on the unsuspecting mayor, using stencils and black spray cans. The images depict Mr. Ontanu, with HONTANU [in Romanian, 'hot' means thief - if you don't get, please stop reading now] written underneath them.

2. after having recovered from the initial shock, Gen. Ontanu swiftly deploy a troop contingent in the conflict zone, and engages the rebels using black spray cans:

3. encouraged by the success of the initial counterinsurgency operation, government forces intensify attacks, this time using unconventional weaponry, in the form of glue and posters of Mr. Ontanu:

According to unconfirmed sources, the valiant government-led response to the rebel threat has been able to restore some order in the district. Even so, the situation remains tense. Eyewitnesses have reported seeing the rebels fleeing into caves labelled with a capital ‘M’, which are presumably used to stage a counterattack.

For the time being, we encourage all foreign residents to refrain from travelling to the Second District of Bucharest, as the security situation remains dire. Of course, we will keep you informed of any major developments as they unfold. In the meantime, PLEASE check BBC News, as there is some seriously disturbing stuff going on out there!

Each signature matters.

May Day should have been a day of celebration for Gordon Brown’s Labour Party, as a reminder of its trade union roots and past connection with the blue collar industrial heartland of Britain. This year’s local elections pretty much spoiled Labour’s party. And things are not looking to get better anytime soon.

The May 1 local elections saw the worst defeat for Labour in 40 years. To add insult to the injury, yesterday’s elections for London’s top post ended the era of Ken Livingstone, who lost by a somewhat narrow margin to Boris Johnson, the Conservative posh boy.

That was a hell of a cold shower for Gordon Brown, if he ever needed one [which is unlikely, given his country of residence]. Labour voters pretty much stayed at home or worse, voted for the opponents. Tories in London mobilized in record number and cast their votes in favor of Boris Johnson.

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Most people around here [including myself, although for entirely different reasons] are counting the days till the local elections [with the first round scheduled on june 1]. What about a totally different kind of countdown? A countdown to Euro 2008?

According to the official site, we are now at D - 35. And counting. Just to whet your appetite, below is the official anthem of the swiss national team [courtesy of my friend OB]. Once you get past the fucked up German and the strange French, I have to admit it is a pretty cool football song. Allez les gars, gagnez-la

Every day, you think of one word more than a hundred times. [ok...] And it’s not sex [actually, i dunno about that...] What is that word? [sex, you idiot!] It’s “Maybe,” [riiiight....]

Below is an ad. Your task is to establish:

1. The type of company the ad is for

and, more importantly

2. The nationality of the person who came up with the ad is.

The correct answers will be published in a later post. Maybe.

Bucharest, 1st of may, 24 degrees celsius, sunny, national flags hanging on all major streets and on buses, very little traffic. This afternoon in Bucharest had a lot, if not all, the ingredients, for a perfect afternoon.

And yet something was wrong. Do you remember that movie where the main character wakes up in NY to find all streets deserted and the city empty? Creepy huh? Well, Bucharest felt a bit like that today. Actually, I felt like being thrown back into the dark ages of the mid 90s. With virtually all the ‘corporatisti’ away at the Bulgarian seaside, all the semi-rural lower middle out in the woods for a nice ‘gratar’ with ‘pet’ beer and ‘manele’, it almost felt like the city was invaded by an entirely new category of citizens.

For the sake of simplicity, let us call them the underworld. They are made up of a number of subcategories:

1/ the cocalar [chav] teenagers wearing jogging suits, wearing tight white wife-beaters, wearing their cheap sunglasses on their forehead, blonde highlights in their hair.

2/ the rural fake prada jeans, Borat-style green-and-white suit fresh from the bazar.

3/ the elderly senior citizens, very modestly dressed, enjoying a day out in the sun. Otherwise a not so sore sight, if it weren’t for their obvious penury.

4/ the moneyed provincial fancy cars bearing outside bucharest license plates in for a tour of the city. lame.

Right. For one day, I felt like I was thrown back in the mid 1990s. And it was pretty depressing.

Just so you get an illustration of what I’m talking about, here is some photo evidence [albeit taken with my camera phone, set to a remarkably low resolution due to my stupidity]:

1. menu at ‘Tropikana’ casino/bar, smack downtown next to Architecture Faculty, who graciously serves Carlberg lager for a mere 13 RON [EUR 3.7] Perfect for the first-time visitor fresh off the plane.

2. concert ad for Ion Laceanu, the guy who shook hands w/ Kennedy [!] one month before he died. Mr. Laceanu is accompanied by his own personal band, aptly named ‘The Rhapsody of the Carpathians’. Still not convinced? You should know, then, that Mr. Laceanu has performed for no less than 17 heads of state.